The Lantern: The Nobel Peace Prize

My new article in The Lantern as a part of 8th Floor’s new comedy column:

8thfloorimprov:

by Brady O’Callahan

The following is a press release found in a recycling receptacle in the Norwegian Nobel Committee’s break room:

The Nobel Peace Prize for 2009 
The Norwegian Nobel Committee has decided that the Nobel Peace Prize for 2009 is to be awarded to the Norwegian Nobel Committee for the Committee’s consistent advocacy of worldwide peace and cooperation between peoples. Peace cannot be achieved until those who advocate peace are advocated. The Committee has attached special importance to its vision of rewarding peaceful efforts.

The Committee, as five members appointed by the Norwegian Parliament, has created a model for peaceful action and recognition. Democracy and reasoned thought have regained its importance in the endeavor for furthering Alfred Nobel’s vision of “fraternity between nations… and promotion of peace congresses.” Nominating and voting are preferred as instruments for deciding even the most deserving of candidates for prizes.

The vision of a world inhabited by Nobel Peace Prize laureates has stimulated the Committee’s interest in awarding Nobel Peace Prizes. Thanks to the Norwegian Nobel Committee’s initiative, the Norwegian Nobel Committee is now playing a more advocative role in advocating peace and encouraging encouragement. Advocacy for peace and peace itself are to be bolstered.

Since its inception in 1900, the Committee has endorsed such peacemakers as Al Gore, Nelson Mandela, Mother Theresa and Fridtjof Nansen. The Norwegian Nobel Committee recognizes the Committee’s aptitude in supporting advocates of peace and applauds its continued encouragement with the selection of itself.

For 108 years, the Norwegian Nobel Committee has sought to stimulate precisely that advocacy for peace and those attitudes for which the Norwegian Nobel Committee upholds. The Norwegian Nobel Committee wishes to communicate the hope that others may be inspired by the Committee’s efforts and achievements.
–Oslo, October 9, 2009

Check out the column on The Lantern’s website.  Comment and spread the word!